Nesting.

I've decided nesting isn't just for pregnant women because I'm nesting... and yes, I'm NOT pregnant.

Maybe it's because in 2 weeks my baby goes to kindergarten. I have closets to sort through. Clothes to weed out. Drawers that need organized and random organizational items that need a home in my home.

Maybe this is my way of avoiding the emotions surrounding this big event for two weeks.

I'm project-oriented. So if I have a project to do I am very focused on the project. This is often my downfall. I apologize if you have ever tried to have a conversation with me when I am in project mode. I am a woman on a mission and I lose a bit of social graces when I'm in this place.

All I know is...
I can't control the fact that my baby is growing up.
I can't control any of the things I've regretted doing or not doing with her over the past five years.
I can't control the spill of emotions that are going to be involved in the big first day of school (I am regularly fighting back tears about it.)
I can't control a lot of things in her life and I think kindergarten is a big wake-up call to that for me (and I'm sure many other parents.)
but I CAN CONTROL the organization of my little munchkins space (and some other areas of the house experiencing my project mode.)

Last thing...I apologize to all of those parents who I secretly thought were making a bigger deal about starting school than they needed to over the past few years. I love you all but yes, I did think you all were crazy to cry and sob and take all of the crazy pictures with your kid holding their backpack or standing in front of the school bus. So, on Monday August 22nd, I will proudly cry and embarrass myself with displays of love and silly candid and posed photo ops to let some other naive parent think I'm a fool before they truely know what it's like! It's okay with me. I can take it. My baby's going to kindergarten.